sparks has sparked my interest again!

well Nicholas Sparks has done it again people. I will be the first to admit.. i love his books. i am a sucker for romantic novels, and his usually do the trick. I loveddd Dear John, The Choice, and a few others.. i'm drawing a blank on the names. BUT the movies are never quite as good. Dear John, the book, is completely different than the movie, and quite frankly the book is sooo much better and more realistic. Anyway, i am way excited for this movie to come out! Ummm HELLO Zach Efron and Nicholas Sparks? Perfect movie set up.

Start off your day right...

"Don't demand things that are unreasonable, but demand of yourself improvement. As you let the Lord help you, through that, He will make the difference."

Such a perfect reminder. I think we all have the tendency to be 'weak in heart' sometimes, but i am grateful for the knowledge that my Savior is there to help me become strong!

Perfect words for a perfect reminder

I got this quote at church on sunday and i absolutely love it. So read on people.. you will love it just as much.. i'm sure of it.

"No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude, and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable; more worthy to be called the children of god."
-Elder Orson F. Whitney

In that case, bring on the trials. Teach me patience, faith, fortitude, humility, and build my character pleaseeee.

Also, i wanted to throw out a public THANK YOU to all of you who have sent me cute messages, left ever-so-sweet comments, thoughtful texts, facebook messages, etc....I am so grateful for the constant reminders that people can relate to how i feel, and the gentle reminder that people genuinely care about my well-being. Seriously though.. you guys are the best!!

i just wish

..people would stop thinking that they know everything about my life. I got another awesome text from 141000008... remember them? Just when i thought the storm was over this lovely tries to tell me what i need to do. Really people? you would think they would have understood the first time!...apparently not.

Lessons to be learned (for my purposes only): your best friends can prove to be your worst. Random people will always think they know best. And in the end, all that matters is what your Heavenly Father thinks. Personally, i think he loves me no matter what.

they are married.

yup it is official! Heather and Carson are MARRIED! it was such a fun reception and they were sooo happy. I am ecstatic for these two and can't wait to see where life takes them next!

Hey thanks to Kylee and Caitlin for providing me with the pictures :)

i feel loved

Well i had an epiphany the other day. I was driving home from st george and having my much needed thinking time. All of a sudden i started crying. Not a sad cry though, but tears of happiness. I was suddenly full of such love for all my great friends. Sure i have always known my friends were great, but really i am surrounded by the best. Within a matter of 24 hours my feelings went from feeling completely alone, to the exact opposite.. nothing near that. My friends care and they love me for who i am.

It all started Tuesday morning with a voicemail from my dear Whitley. All it said was.. "HALEYYYY J call meee backkkkkk." The simple tone of her voice alone made me so happy. Then i got a text from Preston telling me he was excited for me to watch him play. Then a phone call from Nate. It had been awhile since we talked, and a simple "how are you hay, we haven't talked in awhile" turned into an hour conversation. Next a phone call from my mother expressing her feelings for me and her opinions of my life. She is one wise woman i tell you! My 3rd grade teacher randomly wrote on my FB saying she was thinking about me. I arrived in St George and headed to get pedi's with Whit. Such a perfect catch up activity. She told me her latest news, and i told her mine. I love chats with whit.. she is so non-judgmental and such a good listener. We met up with Ammon and Luke for dinner.. which was way fun getting to know Luke a little more. I received a phone call from jess saying that she was having a BOY!!!! gahhhh i flipped!!! Later that night at the Dixie State vs Montana game i got to see Madison. Love that girl. And Court and Morgan too. Sooo many good friends i tell you! I even got to see some of my old 'baseball buddies'.. quinn and hanley. And of course, we can't forget Hesterly. And, i got to meet some of my friend's friends (does that even make sense?) .. Tyler, Luke, Tyler, Rhett. People i constantly hear stories about, and i finally got to put faces to the names. I got to talk to Prest and Chase very briefly after the game and it made me soo happy. i got a text from Eric Proctor asking me about Africa--always a happy subject, PLUS conversations with eric always turn out to be hilarious. Then, i had another amazing conversation with Ammon... seriously conversations with that boy are always the best. Heading home and walkin into the house to a little surprise from whit made me smile and reminisce about our freshman year. (Jacie... all fours ring a bell?) And the conversation to follow made me even happier. Somehow, whit, min, and i, ended up staying up til 5:15 in the morning just chatting about who even knows what. Love those girls like sisters. Naturally we watched wedding and engagement videos on vimeo... Ya know since we are all sooo close to getting married. bahahhahaah. We practically fell asleep on my little twin bed and woke up wayyy too early the next morning for various reasons. Definitely made for a happy morning.

The next day all the love continued. Anddd it continues! Seriously i dont know how i ever got so lucky to be surrounded by the best. I love my friends. And i am extremely grateful to my Heavenly Father for the wonderful people he has put in my life. Ya know that quote about being an answer to someone else's prayer if you are doing what is right? well i am soo grateful that my friends have been worthy to receive the revelation they have been given. Because, with out even knowing it they have been answers to my prayers in their own little way. I am grateful for the Lords timing and plan for me. I know that he hears and answers my prayers. Even if they don't come when i want them or think they should. He answers them in His time.. and sometimes all the answers come at once. Life is sooo GOOD people!

Feel free to skip the pics.. but it does provide a nice little look at my numerous hair colors over the years..
Madison and I in AZ my sophomore year 
The girls at Karaoke night 
Hesterly and I after we went rabbit hunting
Haley. Lexi. Haley. 
The gang at Carson's homecoming.
Jason. Brayden. Ky. Stets. Jess. Cars.Nate. Haley. Craig. Lace. Heath
The kicks at Jaim's wedding!
Jess. Haley. Jaim. Dut. Brooke. steph
Jess and Whit
Scottie and I
Min. Paige. Hay. Whit. 
Flashback to high school! Cody and Presty :) 

first comes love.. then comes marriage.. then comes.....

Babies in the baby carriage. GAHH!! two of my besties are PREGGO! i have been waiting and waiting for the news to go public and finally i can share my joy with you! Jess and Ev are having their baby at the beginning of April, and Brooke and Dan's baby is due at the end of June! wow wow wow! i am so excited for both of these couples. Seriously Jess and Brooke are going to be amazing mothers, and Ev and Dan are going to be awesome fathers. I am still in shock that a lot of my friends are beginning to start their families. Seriously when did i get so old? Hellooooo permanent baby sitting job for Haley!
Brookie and Dan! 

Jess and Ev.. and their dog Sadie of course
Plus i really hope they dont mind that i stole these pictures from their facebooks.. Seriously i am soo happy for them!


Wow i am such an awesome blogger. Really.. a week after Halloween and i haven't even shown off my pictures! Halloween is seriously one of my favoriteee holidays. i love dressing up! and every year i have the best ideas what to dress up as.. the only problem is.. these ideas come after halloween! what the crap. This year i had high hopes for myself and ended up being a last minute witch. See the problem?  How does Halloween sneak up so fast?! I still had an awesome Halloween and i loved hanging out with my girl Scottie. We went to a few lame parties and somehow still managed to make each other laugh. Our favorite thing to do is to act like legit crazy chicks.. like we have random way loud fake laugh attacks and watch as people just stare at us. This usually leads to us 'real laughing' to the point we literally can't stop. Ok now that you know how lame we are, i promise you we have this weird ability to make fun wherever we go. It was awesome. Oh and Scottie.."what were you again?!" hahahahah love you girl!

The witch is in
typical mother making me and the sis take pics together in our costumes 

Just loving the AWESOME parties. hahahahahahahaha
 Best cosume of the night goes to this guy...... he looked legitttt.

Now that i have done my Halloween post.. i can officially Welcome November! I'll be honest... Thanksgiving isn't one of my favorite holidays. I'm not a huge fan of the whole thanksgiving dinner menu.. Turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing? not my exact forte, but i'll definitely take some of grandma's rolls! In my opinion it is a little over rated. BUT any excuse to be with my family, express thanks, and get out of school is totallyyyyy worth it. Bring on the turkey!

my babe

While in Africa, we have the opportunity to go to an orphanage for babies aging from newborn to 4 years old. The police bring the babes here after they have found them abandoned on the streets. Sometimes, the babies are left at the gate because the mother is ashamed of the pregnancy (usually because she was raped by a family member--something highly frowned upon yet soo common). The first year the orphanage was one of the highlights of my trip, and this year was no different. I love the kids there with all my heart. It is a place where i am given the opportunity to give genuine and instant love to children who have never really felt it. There are 4 women who work at this orphanage, and each of them are in charge of 10 children. All day. every day. To say they need a little help is an understatement.

This year i was lucky enough to be able to spend the majority of my time there with the newborn babies. Babies are my favorite. Don't get me wrong, i loveee toddlers. But there is just something about holding a baby in your arms. Just knowing they were recently with our Heavenly Father is indescribable. So innocent, helpless, and pure. We arrived at the orphanage while the babies were napping, and one by one as they awoke, each of us was given a baby to hold and care for. I was handed my sweet little Mary. She was so tiny and well behaved. She hardly made a peep besides her little laughing squeal (make sure to watch the video at the end of this post). She was so ticklish and had the cutest dark curly hair. She cuddled right up to me and just laid on my chest. I was instantly in love.

It's hard to express the feelings i get when i think of my experiences in Kenya. Quite honestly, that's why i don't really blog about it all that much. There is no way to come close to putting in words the feelings i have for that wonderful place. And there is no way to adequately describe the deep and immediate love i felt for my little babe Mary. It was sooo hard leaving knowing the reality of her circumstance. I secretly wanted to put her in my backpack and sneak her home.  But I have hope that she will be one of the few to be adopted this year. ......And if she isn't, well, you better believe as soon as i get married i will be finding her and be bringing her home with me for good!

Mary from Haley Hansen on Vimeo.

ok how adorable is she..really though? oh and please ignore the fact that i keep saying how much she loves the camera. I know i sound dumb and geeky in my 'baby talk voice'.. but in my defense, she really did loveeee it.

farewell little brother

It's official! I have the cutest missionary brother on the planet. We took him to the MTC on wednesday and although a little rough, i couldn't be more proud of the kid. He is a hard worker, dedicated, smart, loving, hilarious, trustworthy, and dependable. I already miss our late night chats about boys, girls, family, drama, or the gospel. I cherish the nights when East would knock on my door and come lay on my bed while we just talked about life. We laughed (mostly at Kalinee sleep talking), we cried, we got mad, and we laughed some more. But he taught me so much, and still continues to teach me. He is so mature and has more faith than anyone i know. The people of Guatemala are seriously sooo lucky to have him.

We got our first email today. He is doing sooo awesome and i couldn't be more proud! He said he keeps preparing himself for that awful, horrible, terrible, day everyone said he would have, and he was happy to report it hadn't happened yet. Good news right?! He said he is staying busy and working hard to learn 'this spanish stuff'. hahah His companion is from canada.. to which he responded.."Canada eh?!" it was hilarious and made all of us laugh. He will be in the Provo MTC for about 3 weeks, and then he will head to the Guatemala MTC for another 6. Yay for missionaries!

i knew it

ya know those feelings you get when you know the inevitable will happen?
ya know those feelings you get when you try to forget the past and believe the same thing wont happen again?
ya know those feelings you get when you try soo hard to make something right and it doesn't work out?
ya know those feelings you get when you trust someone with all you have?
ya know those feelings you get when you love someone? maybe even two?
ya know those feelings you get when someone is honest with you but it feels like the exact opposite?
ya know those feelings you get when you feel like you have made yourself clear and people still don't understand?
ya know those feelings you get when you feel like your good friends have done you wrong?
ya know those feelings you get when you feel like no one has listened to you?
ya know those feelings you get when you feel like all you want to do is cry?
ya know those feelings you get when you can't wait to leave town ..and wish you could leave forever?
ya know those feelings you get when people get in your business that have no right?
ya know those feelings you get when you really just wanna throw your phone at the wall and hope it shatters into a billion pieces?
ya know those feelings you get when you people say you'll regret things but you know you wont?
ya know those feelings you get when people literally think you are crazy? and you're being logical?
ya know those feelings you get when you find out your best friend is pregnant?
ya know those feelings you get when someone tells you one thing and does the opposite?
ya know those feelings you get when other parents call your parents to talk about your friendships?
ya know those feelings you get when you are so exhausted but so emotionally wound up that you can't sleep?
ya know those feelings you get when your best-friend-brother leaves on a mission and you have to be the strong one?
ya know those feelings you get when you finally break down?
ya know those feelings you get when you heavenly father comforts you?
ya know those feelings you get when you feel like you never want to leave your house everrrr?
ya know those feelings you get when you are so excited to see someone that tomorrow can't come fast enough?
ya know those feelings you get when you read your scriptures and somehow your heart is calmed?
you did know. and you did it anyway. and i knew it would happen as much as i thought you would be better than that.

.....yeah i'm calling it a night. it's been one from hell. and one from heaven. buttttt we'll end on that.


i have been a little vague with my blog lately. i have been beating around the bush and leaving you all wondering. i haven't wanted to put it all out there, and quite frankly, i probably won't ever do that. But eventually i will tell you what is going on. Life hasn't been all peaches and cream lately and things i thought would happen FOR SURE, may not. it is a constant day to day process and i am working on learning the lessons meant for me. I promise i will give you the deets soon. But until then.. just keep me in your prayers. Yup i threw it out there. i need your prayers. :)